Now that the book is launched and Medusa is open for business, I am learning to juggle the myriad parts of myself and my life. All the labels I wear are gracelessly colliding; Mom, Writer, Publisher, Wife, Pet-Owner, Home-Owner, Business-Owner. Medusa's catch phrase, "Transforming Chaos into Art," has taken an all too personal meaning as I climb over piles of laundry to get to my room, hunt for a pen that actually works, then try to clear a spot on my desk to pay a bill. I can't sit on my chair because it is piled with three coats and the blue ball-gown I wore for Halloween. Instead, I'm perched on the step stool, trying to reach the key board while my cat presses her nose against my wrist.
Yesterday was another book event for Laura. Her boss threw a book party and all of Laura's co-workers and many of the families included in the book were going to be there. 30 minutes before the party, Laura called needing a ride. No problem. I went into my daughter's room and announced it was time to go to "the party." My daughter didn't budge. She sat on her bed in full 12 year old angst with snot running from her nose.
I asked if she was feeling alright.
"Yes," she growled.
I wiped her nose and felt her head. A little warm, but she said she's fine, so we should still be able to go, right?
The child would not budge.
"Do you want to go?" I asked.
She wrapped her arms around herself tightly and said, "I don't know."
Just then, my husband walked in the door, ready to go to the party, too. He's the book designer and has so far missed any of the celebrating. Now it looked like he couldn't come to this party either. He said no problem, he needed to study for school any way. Class started in an hour. That gave me about 45 minutes at the party.
I grabbed a few books, drove madly to grab Laura, who I had made late while fighting with my daughter, and arrived at the party for my 30 minutes of celebration. I was bummed. This was the one night my girl could come and share in the celebration. She was on the cover of the dang thing, and a whole chapter was about her. I wanted to show her off and let her feel some of the energy I felt sharing the glow of Laura's book. Oh well. I drank some apple juice, gave the books to Laura, and went home.
Sometimes this motherhood gig sucks.
2 comments:
Terena,
OH, how I can relate. The many hats we wear, as women, and the role we play and integrate into one being are myriad and many.
I am a full-time student, part-time teacher, full-time mother to three (3,5, 7). And that's just for starters. Then I'm also a wife, sister, friend, daughter, and your self. And I'm trying to start a business again (too draining the first time around...I'm going to slog into it again. I feel brave!
Anyway, I truly admire your triumph in publishing this book, and I think you are inspiring.
Kristin
I am writing my autobiography entitled "Misdemeanors & Felonies: A Memoir . . . From what I have seen I am wondering if you might be interested in a book about a lost soul which left two sets of children to grow up without knowing their father. These children, after they were grown made it their business to find me . . . There were/are questuons, of course, and I have decided to answer them the best way I know how in the book. The book begins thusly: "For a large chunk of my life I was a self-centered bastard. The self-centered part of that statement is all my own doing. The bastard part was the fault of my parents, whoever they were." I was not a good guy for many years of my life . . . I did things which shouldn't have been done. I'm sorry if I am using this comment section to pitch an unfinished book, but it just felt like the right thing to do. My email . . . fauxcajunjerry@aol.com
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